dear tragedy.

We were on the verge of victory, the crowd was clearly chanting the name of our team, howling and cheering for us as we continued to push our opponents into the narrow corner that would soon lead to their defeat. The push continued, we were on the brink of victory the black wordings emerged, it was almost done. All we could hear was the voices of our supporters behind us, screaming , cheering us on. Then , the only,most unexpected event occurred that was our enemies only possible saving grace , a rough 5% chance estimation of succession , a moment of confusion and the next 30 seconds were pure tragedy for us. That's how the day went for us on the 29th of september 2009. My friends and I were competing in an online gaming competition at Berjaya Times Square , the prize was a grand trip to Japan and it was fair to say that we were favourited to win it hands down. Don't you just hate it when you knew that something was well within the reach of your hands, then in a split second, everything that seems possible to go wrong does go wrong? That's how we felt, frustrated and dissapointed we started pointing fingers at one another for the day's outcome. Instead of being happy of how close we got , we were instead obssessed with the fact that we managed to lose instead of having the biggest advantage you could possibly have. That day took a toll on our friendship and perception of each other, words need not be said to show the amount of frustration and dissapointment we had felt on that day. We sat across each other as we had lunch, utter silence, not a word from any of us. These little facts of non-verbal language was seen by our supporters and friends, which then incorporated them to calming us down and cheering us up.It was pretty evident from the body language we were emitting that we were completely unhappy about the outcome. Lady luck was definitely not helping us on that day, we bit in our bitter fate and went on that day , not much to be said on the trip home , just two simple words. "**** this"
can't say we didnt try.
don't know if this can be related to human comm. :S





Kenny Lee.

Personal Listening Styles

Each of us has their own personal listening style and it is vary from each other. Have you ever thought of which type of personal listening style you often used in your daily life during communicating with your family and friends? On the other hand, knowing your own personal listening style can often help you a lot in your listening process. According to the communication researchers, there are four different types of personal listening styles, such as content-oriented, people-oriented, action-oriented and time-oriented. Each of the personal listening style has their own uniqueness and drawback.

First, I will like to talk about content-oriented listeners. A content-oriented listener is more concerned on the content of the message that the sender has send. They will like to know more in detail on the issue rather than any other type of listeners. They like to spend time to analyze and explore the issue. They are very good in analytical skill. Although it is very time consuming to analyze the issue, they are willing to do for it. However, a content-oriented listener might become overly critical.

Next, I will to turn to people-oriented listeners. A people-oriented listener is more concern with maintaining and creating a good relationship. They always like to put in other people shoes when other people facing some problem. They are very good in understanding other people. They always give full support to people who need help. On the other hand, a people-oriented listener may sometimes become over conscious of other people feelings and too emotional, which can lead to a low ability to judge the message.

Subsequently, I will like to talk about action-oriented listeners. An action-oriented listener is more concern on the task at hand. They always like to think of what kind of response they should response to the sender’s message. An action-oriented listener is more suitable to take care of business because they have fulfilled the criteria of being a good businessman and businesswoman. However, an action-oriented listener will be less concern on emotional issue as compared to the people-oriented listener.

Now, I will like to talk about the time-oriented listeners. A time-oriented listener is more concern of efficiency. They take time as a valuable and precise thing. They do not like to waste their time on unimportant issue. They are also very punctual during handing their work and assignment. However, they sometimes seem to put off others and disregard of other feelings.

Compiled by,

LAI SHU TIING

Hearing and Listening

Do you know what is the difference between listening and hearing? Is listening a natural process? Most of the people will answer that hearing and listening are the same and they also assume that the listening process is a natural process. However, they are wrong because they have misunderstood it.

First, I would like to explain that hearing and listening are not the same. Hearing is the process in which the sound waves strike the eardrum and cause vibrations that are transmitted to the brain. In contrast, listening occurs when the brain constructs these electrochemical impulses into a representation of the original sound and then gives them meaning. For example, during our primary and secondary school, our teacher always asked us this question, “boys and girls, are you all listening to what I had just said?” Most of the students will answer, “yes, teacher.” However, when the teacher asked us to recall what she had said, we often cannot recall and we always kept quiet. This incident has showed us that most of the students are not listening whereas they are just hearing. On the other hand, the hearing process cannot be stopped and that is why the student can hear but not listen to the teacher.

Next, I will also like to clarify the misconception that listening is a natural process. Actually, listening is not a natural process. Although we often listen to other people, however, not many people can do it well because the listening process requires some skill. Some of the people who went for a job interview cannot do well in their job interview because they fail to understand the instruction and they are also poor in listening. This listening process can be improved through extra training and instruction. Those who have poor listening skills are encouraged to go for extra training so that their listening skill will improve.

Compiled by,

LAI SHU TIING

EXPRESSING YOURSELF

There is nothing I can say
to make you understand,
because how can I express myself
in such a simple way as words?

A thought to your mind,
but a feeling to your soul,
and words cannot logically change
for the purpose of communication.

To convey a feeling
is not like to convey a thought,
so I’ll send out my emotions
and pray they reach your soul.

communication is process of exchanging communication and ideas. Its an active process involving encoding, transmitting and decoding intended messages. There are many means of communicating and many different language systems. Plus, there are many ways to tell stories and express our feelings such as by poem declamation.

When all about you is black with gloom,

And all you feel is pending doom.

When your bones are racked with grim despair -

When every breath is a gasp for air.

Keep on going, though you need to grope,

For around the bend is a ray of hope.

A ray of hope is perhaps all that's left,

As your will to live has been bereft.

You've lost it all, it's just no use!

You can end it all, you need no excuse.

But throw away that piece of rope,

And give yourself a chance of hope.

Just give yourself another day,

Brushing aside what your thoughts may say.

This is your life and you can make a new start,

By ignoring the brain - just follow the heart.

Taking baby steps in order to cope,

And minute by minute you'll build on your hope.

Build on your hope,. one day at a time,

Though the road be steep and hard to climb.

The hurts of the past - they should be dead.

The fears of the future are all in your head.

Just live in the present and refuse to mope

Your life will sparkle for you're living in hope.

IZYAN ARINA MAZLAN

B0901417

How We Work!!

Sometimes not everything you see is true. A person has various parts in themselves and based on the Johari Window there are 4, the open self, the blind self, the unknown self and the hidden self. We usually don’t realize all these because we just perform it. The open self is usually what we show others like our gender, our physical appearance. It is basically what you tell people and how you open up to them. The blind self is what others know about you that you don’t know or don’t realize. These may include your habits which you don’t realize about. For example sometimes when you like interfering in peoples conversations you don’t realize it but they do! And it is important to reduce this part of a person to avoid emotional upset and conflicts with people. The third is the unknown self. This is the deep side which neither you or others are aware of. This can include feelings, behavior or even personality. For example a fear someone has but is not aware about or even illnesses which is possessed but unaware about. And the last is the hidden self. This is the mysterious part where you know it but you keep it a secret from others. This includes anything that a person knows but does not reveal, for whatever reason. It's natural for very personal and private information and feelings to remain hidden. However sometimes letting out our feelings can make a person feel much better.Therefore a person should have a little of all the above characteristics but not too much of any because without realizing it can sometimes cause conflicts or even emotional problems.

-Ashreen Kaur-

Why Mars & Venus collide

Recently, whenever i go into a book sales, for sure, i would bring back stacks of books.
It was not a habit for me to read, especially to those who knows me well.
Good thing, i do not go craze about fashion much then.
Anyways, I am reading this book called "Why Mars & Venus collide" by John Gray.

Familiar?
Yes, it is the same author for "Man are from Mars, Women are from Venus."
It is nearly somewhat the same- it mentions about the communications and emotion need between two genders.
However, this book teaches you why and how people get breakdowns from their relationships,
also not to mention, ways to overcome these.

As i read the book, there was something caught my eyes.
In fact it is two quotations from the book -

" It makes it much easier to talk without blaming when we remember that we speak different languages."
" Mixing feelings and problem solving simply does not work"

It does not only applies on couples, but general.
Imagine, if we can talk face to face, pressing down and anger, trying to solve a problem in good manner, damage in the relationship would be reduced!
How many of us could actually solve problems, face to face, by using patience and positive attitudes, not by blaming on each other?
You can say that asians normally do not do that.
Some people thinks that they are fighting for their respect and rights.
Actually, that is creating more problems.
If they are open minded and accepted facts, at least the problem is solved.

The book also mentioned about women, avoiding fights and improving situations.
It says that a woman should not challenge man with threatening questions and comments.
Normally, when quarreling, guys would pretend listening when people are "nagging" to them, especially the women.
Then they will tell him that he is not listening.
They would tell him this.
" You are not listening, you will never understand."
He may have reacted upon to that, especially when he thinks that his or her comment is absurd.

Instead, they should tell him in a positive way.
For example, " Let me say this differently"
At least guys would be glad that they are changing slightly the way they explain.
Imagine you are the guy, maybe you will understand more.

Men and Women communicate differently.
If you want to prevent colliding, then read the book.
It helps, not only to couples, but to any communications.
^^


-Cheng Yee

sortiee!

I've never thought that the consequence of taking up Human Communications would require me to actually post in a blog. My name is Kenny Lee, aged 18 years old and I'm not exactly what you would call an eloquent writer. That doesn't mean that I do not enjoy reading blogs and articles though, I enjoy them tremendously and indulge in whatever I find interesting or time worthy. However, I feel that an introductory post should first be made to introduce myself to my fellow group members and Mr Murali himself. This is a blog created by our group members as part of a task assigned to us by our Human Communications class lecturer, Mr Murali and will be evaluated and assessed to a score which would ultimately be added to our final year assessment of the subject. This means no vulgarities, unrelated spam, indecent content and a much much harder time for me to actually post anything relevant. My group mates are great and all but I hope the fact that i'm the only male in the group won't disrupt my communications with the other 4 group members which consists of the opposite gender. Though we will have our differences in opinions and interests, which is probably cause of our cultural differences aswell.(look, I study in class 8D) Despite our group having a diverse panel of members, I'm pretty sure we're going to get along fine. right gals? (;
oh yeah, and that picture was just to make my post seem longer.

Kenny Lee.